And a one… I was in my sparring gear, the other day, and I guess you could describe me as breathing — sort of. It felt more like a gasp, but let me move on. My awesome instructor, one who never shies away from a great teaching moment, pats me on the back and says, “Get out of your head. Stop thinking about what to do and just do it.” So we try again with not much success. My reality was not matching up to my vision.
I won’t even post a pic of what reality looked like. I came to the conclusion, rather quickly, that I am just not good at sparring. Then, my brilliant instructor does something interesting. He becomes the voice that I was expecting to hear in my own head and says, “round, round, spin round. Do you see it now?” I did. And that was when, me, “The Headcase” thought, “Oh yes, I know exactly what I need – PRACTICE!”
Remember when you were in school, and you knew how to do a math problem, but when you actually tried to do it, you kept making mistakes? If you were like me, you started saying things like, “Oh, I am just not good at math,” or later on, “Oh, I am just not good at sparring.” 🙂 Oh yes, that explanation can cause so much trouble. It was definitely true that I wasn’t getting the result that I wanted, but my “explanation” was not accurate. I was expecting an outcome that I hadn’t practiced for. I just had an expectation that if I knew how to do something, doing it would be just how I had imagined. No, life doesn’t quite work that way. I actually had to put in the work (and the right kind of work) to make my imagination a reality. Blast!! I knew there was a catch.
So I came up with a method that was simple to remember and easy to use, so that my lame explanations would be replaced by consistent, constructive action. Maybe it will help you, too.
I call it the It’s OKAY Ninja, Work It Method (all rights reserved 🙂 )
Step 1: Options: What are they? List them. If you are satisfied with the list, go directly to Step 3. If nothing comes to mind, or the options you came up with are not up to your standards go to Step 2.
Step 2: Kall for help: Help!!! There are resources to help you when you open yourself up to look for them. Remember who, what, where, when, why, and how from English class? Apply it here. Who can help me? Where can I get it or use it? When as in how often to apply it or when will it work? What as in what actions to try? leads you to How to handle the obstacle.
Step 3: Act: Take action on the How you learned in Step 2. For me, in this example, it meant getting in the sparring ring more than twice a month.
Step 4: Yes: As in yes you can be successful by evaluating and then acting on the feedback you get. If you haven’t achieved the result you wanted, immediately go back to Step 1 and repeat the steps until you are successful. If you have succeeded, congratulations you are officially an Obstacle Planning Ninja!!
I know that to some of you out there this advice is just simple common sense, but sometimes, we need a little common sense upside the head to help us get out of our own way. Don’t let “explanations” prevent you from succeeding. If you want it, keep working the OKAY method till you get it! Practice this and see for yourself!
From one Headcase to another,