What Are You REALLY After?

What Gives? In this mini-primer on goal setting, I ask you some questions that help you get to the heart of  your choices, help you to cut the crap, and help you to choose and make the most important goals in your life a reality.

Don’t freak. It’s just three questions. You’ve got time for that, don’t you? The less resolute of you will have already moved on right about now. Those of you who stick around are in for a cool process.

Directions: Pick the answer that is most true for you for each question, and write it down. By the way, there are no right or wrong answers. This is all about you and what moves you the most. Ready?

Question 1: What is the most important goal to get done today?

A. I want to feel great when I finish it

B. I have to make money to take care of myself and my family

C. My boss, parents, friends et al are going to be disappointed if I don’t do it

D. People will be impressed when they hear I’ve done it

Question 2: What is your favorite superpower? You can only pick one. Remember pick your “favorite” and NOT the one you want most.

A. Perfect vision. I can see past, present and future.

B. Perfect hearing.  I can hear the thoughts of the world. I can hear the whispers even from miles away.

C. Perfect strength. I can withstand any force. I can move mountains. I can jump as high as I want.

D. Perfect speech. I can speak and understand any language.

Question 3: At the end of the day, what to do you want to feel most? (Be honest. This is truth not shopping 🙂 )

A. I am on top of the world. I accomplished everything that was important to me.

B. I am satisfied that I did my best.

C. I am so lucky to have the people I love around me.

D. My life is on track.

That’s it. You’ve got all you need. Now, let’s break this thing down. And no, I’m not going to give you the answers, and tell you who you are because of  your choices. I am going to write about the answers, and allow you to come to your own conclusions.

Question 1. It’s all about your intention. If you know the why of any goal, it not only helps you execute and focus better, it helps keep you motivated when things get tough. The most helpful tool here is to define what you intend in clear language so that you can connect to what drives your purpose.

If you answered…

  A. I want to feel great when I finish it. Your focus is on how you want to feel. “Great” means different things to different people. Define what great means to you, what activities would give you that feeling, and why you want to feel great.

B. I have to make money to take care of myself and my family. Your focus is on security. Define security (it’s not as obvious as you think), what other activities would give you that feeling, and why you want to feel secure.

C. My boss, parents, friends et al are going to be disappointed if I don’t do it. Your focus is on approval. Define approval, what other activities would give you that feeling, and why you want to feel approval.

D. People will be impressed when they hear I’ve done it.  Your focus is on significance. You want to feel important and admired. Define significance, what other activities would give you that feeling, and why you want it.

Question 2: What is your favorite superpower? It’s all about your favorite tool. When we pick our favorites we gravitate to what we like most, and that tends to be our own strengths. It feels good to use our strengths and use them when we go after what we want. This tool can makes you feel more powerful, confident and in control of yourself and your life.

If you answered…

A. Perfect vision. I can see past, present and future. You like to see it all, and you like to “see” how things are connected, and how they work. Mind maps, journaling, and flow charts are just some of the tools you can use. How can you use your visual superpower to your best advantage?

B. Perfect hearing.  I can hear the thoughts of the world. I can hear the whispers even from miles away. You like to hear it. Sounds are where it is at for you.  Podcasts, tele-seminars, voice memos, siri are some of the tools that you can use. How can you use your auditory superpower to your best advantage?

C. Perfect strength. I can withstand any force. I can move mountains. I can jump as high as I want. You like to be strong, hold your ground, but move with force when it’s required. Kinesthetic or movement is what works best. You like how it feels when you act, especially with conviction of movement. Use physical activities to help you think and make connections, various smart phone apps, standing desk, anything that allows you to incorporate your body while you work toward your goals are some of the things you can try. How do you use your strength superpower to your best advantage?

D. Perfect speech. I can speak and understand any language. It’s all about connection for you. You like to communicate and connect with others. Brainstorming, voice memos, interviewing are some of the tools you can use. How can you use your speech superpower to your best advantage?

Question 3: At the end of the day, what to do you want to feel most? This is all about your outcome or target. This is who you want to be, what you want to have, and how you want to contribute. What you want to feel most is the sum of what’s most important to you. When all is said, and done, how is it that you would have wanted to live? To get clarity, simply ask why.

If you answered…

A. I am on top of the world since I accomplished everything that is important to me. Why is this the most important feeling to achieve at this time? What goals would give me that feeling?

B. I am satisfied that I did my best. Why is this the most important feeling to achieve at this time? What goals would give me that feeling?

C. I am so lucky to have the people I love around me. Why is this the most important feeling to achieve at this time? What goals would give me that feeling?

D. My life is right on track.Why is this the most important feeling to achieve at this time? What goals would give me that feeling?

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***Speaking of goals,  I am hosting a free webinar that teaches you the three key tools the Pros use to make this year the one that changes everything for you.  If you applied each of the tools I share with you on this free webinar, you will be well on your way to making this year something special. You can sign up for it here.

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Magic Formula. When you have the right intention, the right tools, and the right target, you have a recipe that makes it more likely that you will live life in a way that brings you the most joy at this moment in time. Over time we all change. The goals we choose now will change along with us, which certainly makes life less boring! Try this experiment for the next 90 days:

  1. Choose goals that match your intentions.
  2. Choose goals that utilize your favorite tool.
  3. Choose goals that will lead you to the outcome you want most at the end of the day.

Download my easy-to-use daily worksheet that helps you keep your  Eyes on the Prize

If you want more information about who I am and what I do, head on over to my website at http://www.challengeyourvision.com for more information about coaching, private martial arts instruction, and my three quick start guides that take you from where you are now to where you want to be. Thanks for reading!!

Until next time,

Remember, you are so much more than who you believe yourself to be.

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Hey, You! Yeah, I’m Talking to You!

Not to come across as a crazy person, or anything, but it really does feel like this when I am practicing a new skill. Have you ever had a discussion with yourself about change? Recently, my latest chat went down like this:

New Me: Hey you, I’m talking to you. Pay attention.

Old Me: What? Can’t you see I’m busy running our life? I’ve got a schedule, and habits to perform. I don’t have the time, or the inclination to pay attention to your silly schemes. Do you have any idea what a pain in the a– it is to get pulled off task when you get one of your crazy ideas! Let’s just do what we know, okay?

NM: But I want to try this. I know it will be hard to change, but I will be happier if I take this on. Can’t you just play on the team, instead of trying to bully and dominate everyone just because you’ve been here the longest?

OM knows how to handle this like a Pro:  Yes. I can see that you really hope this is going to work. Whoever said I wasn’t a team player? Of course, I will support you, and even give you some time and resources to be successful. Tell me what you need.

NM believes that OM really is playing on the team now: That’s just great. Well, you know I need to practice. So if you can just give me 30 minutes a day, that would do it.

OM  silently chuckles: Yes, no problem. But if it doesn’t work out, then I get the 30 minutes back, right?

NM: Well, sure, that seems fair!

You’ve probably already figured it out that Old Me doesn’t have any intention of supporting change, and really, lies in wait to swoop in and get her resources back. She doesn’t like to share, and understandably, she has a very important job to do. Her job is to run Team Christine as efficiently as possible. From OM’s perspective, time and again, New Me wants to have “the talk about change.” The problem isn’t change, the problem is that NM isn’t serious. Like a child who can’t decide which is better, the ice cream sundae, or the chocolate covered Oreo pop, NM is anything but committed. OM has learned long ago, that NM tends to be a dabbler when it comes to change. NM jumps at the latest and greatest strategies and techniques, only to abandon them when the going gets tough, when she gets distracted, or when she gets scared. So why should OM give NM her resources? OM’s main gig is to automate for efficiency, and waste of any kind – time, money, effort — really pisses her off. So OM has learned to nod, smile, and play along when NM  “gets serious.”

Don’t get me wrong, OM loves Team Christine, and will do anything in her power to make Team Christine happy, healthy and hopping along on her way to her latest and greatest, but NM has to mean it. The problem is that New Me rarely does, because NM isn’t really clear about why she wants to change. It’s sort of like when she goes shopping: She wants to try on this, and not that, but then, that looks really good, too, so she wants to try that, as well.  NM rarely connects with how the new change is going to fill her up long term. You see, NM tends to be quite short sighted, and that limitation, alone, causes her to focus on the wrong things. NM isn’t a big picture operator like OM, and OM knows from experience that when NM focuses on the wrong things it doesn’t turn out well. OM thinks that NM should think things through a bit more before she commits precious resources to a change that tends to be short sighted.

***Speaking of change,  I just finished a free webinar that teaches you the three key tools the Pros use to make this year the one that changes everything for you.  If you applied each of the tools I share with you on this free webinar, you will be well on your way to making this year something special. You can sign up for it here.

Experiment. I’ve been trying this experiment for almost a week now, and I’m starting to feel like a crazy person, or how I think a crazy person must feel. I’m hyper-focused on my internal dialogue: the comments, the notices, the questions that keep popping up. Who knew my brain was filled with so much friggin radio chatter! Have you ever been outside and made a video of a family event only to discover that you can’t really hear what’s being said, because it’s so loud?! The birds, the breeze, the crickets, the mic picked up everything, and you didn’t even notice it, because your focus was on, well, the task at hand.

What do you focus on? How do you make change stick, and get Old Me to really commit time, energy and mental resources to the new change? It really is a simple answer:  The long term vision you have for your life. What do you want your life to be about, and why? See, what I’ve noticed, is that Old Me is incapable of play, because her vision is confined to the operational aspects of running Team Christine. An operator, by nature of her job description, cannot focus on vision. OM’s focus is to make sure she has everything she needs to run the show: mentally, physically, emotionally, and then she needs to automate it so she can make room in the system for any challenges that come up. Her prime directive is how do I maintain operational integrity to ensure the safety and well being of Team Christine?

If the REASON you want to change is powerful, compelling, and so important, you WILL allocate the necessary resources — focus, discipline, and energy  to make it happen.

New Me has got that dream gene going for her. She wants to explore, create, try and experience life on a whole different level, but she can get short sighted when she doesn’t connect all of those activities to her purpose – to her big why. When NM is short sighted, she lets her emotions run her, instead of her vision. The emotions of pain, pleasure, as well as, the incessant demands of others take over, and she gets caught up in, well, all the noise. Sound familiar?

One of the ways to cut the chatter is to be really clear about why you want it so bad. In this case, if New Me connects to the long term vision she has for her life, and the reasons why it is so so important to her to have that vision, Old Me gets that this isn’t a short-term play. OM feels the intention and purpose behind the request for change, and allocates the appropriate focus necessary to keep New Me on track. Her prime directive is how will this action be in alignment with what I want my life to be about? When that shift happens OM and NM are playing on the same team.

The reason I brought you into my internal dialogue was to illustrate that clarity of purpose creates congruence in your thoughts and in your actions. You no longer respond, so much, to the emotions of the moment, but rather, you choose to act based on a more important need — the need to create a life that fulfills you, excites you, and that makes you proud.

Hey. Hey you, I’m talking to you! Have a great day. 🙂 If you want more information about who I am and what I do, head on over to my website at http://www.challengeyourvision.com for more information about coaching, private martial arts instruction, and my three quick start guides that take you from where you are now to where you want to be. Thanks for reading!!

Until next time,

Remember, you are so much more than who you believe yourself to be.

 

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Do you use a checklist? Do you use one for your life?

Over this past weekend, my girl and I attended a “Girls in Aviation”** conference at the Disney Springs Resort in Orlando. It was over 20 years ago that I exchanged the excitement of flight instruction for diapers, midnight feedings, and the smiles of a beautiful baby girl. Now I was headed back to that world with my youngest to introduce her to the wonderful world of flight. Only she had no interest in becoming a commercial pilot and flight instructor like her mom. She b-lined it to coding, robotics and to the drone zone…of course.

Can you believe it? I couldn’t. I am TRYING to tell her how awesome flying is, and she meets my enthusiasm with a glazed  look, a roll of the eyes and indifference. She just doesn’t know, and that’s okay. I have to accept the fact that until she actually flies a plane, she won’t get it. I love this environment that breathes possibility, and is full of promise. But the coolest thing was to take a mental trip back to a time when I was someone else; and back to a time when  I envisioned a different future for myself. That whole “mind trip”  was well worth the two and half hour drive alone.

First of all, I am a huge fan of Patty Wagstaff – aerobatic pilot queen extraordinaire. She was the key note speaker at lunch, and she put the capital B into the phrase “Bad ass”. She grew up in Japan, learned how to fly in Alaska, and became one of the best aerobatic pilots in the world, AND she flies a really cool plane, too. When I was coming up the ranks, I wanted to be like her. However, the opportunities that existed for female pilots back in the early 1990’s were limited, to say the least, and to have a career with children required some major sacrifices — sacrifices that I wasn’t willing to make. So I gave up my dreams of being an aviatrix, and closed that chapter of my life.

Key Skill. Revisiting my pilot days, however, got me to remember that before every flight, I not only made sure my plane was ready to go, I made sure I was ready to go, as well. You can’t succeed if you operate on the back side of the power curve — this happens when the more power you add in the attempt to gain altitude, actually results in a decrease in altitude. The graphic on the right depicts the concept. Three major things make an aircraft fly: 1. Shape of the wing, 2. Attitude of the plane, and 3. Power.  Some would argue that only one thing will make an airplane fly…MONEY!

Anyway, there is a reason why I brought this up. Operating your life on the back side of the power curve leads to disappointment. You may be doing everything right, but if your attitude ( your mental orientation, the structure of your day, and the time when you act)is not in the optimal position, you will struggle. So what if you had a daily checklist that inspires you and reminds you to make sure you have all of your resources  aligned to ensure a safe, happy, and productive day? Would you be down for learning and using a tool that orients you each day?

********Speaking of orientation, I just finished a free webinar that teaches you the three key tools to use to create a year to remember. If you applied each of the tools I share with you on this webinar, you will be well on your way to making this year something special. You can sign up for it here.

The Point. Checklists not only exist as reminders of what to do, they exist as a way to focus our attention on what’s most important. I am wondering, do you use a checklist? Do you use one for your life? I researched the best practices among my favorite mindset and skill set experts: Tony Robbins, Brendan Burchard, Todd Hermann, and Hal Elrod to name a few.

Since we are all individuals, we may think a little differently. For example, we may use the same words, but they mean something different to each of us. The checklist to the left is blank on purpose. There is a primer in each area of focus to help you think and organize your thoughts, and, thereby, your day in a way that helps you feel your best, and helps you focus your attention on getting your best work done, while still enjoying the flow of your day.

Below are some best practices to help you think about what you want to go on your Pre-Day checklist:

Tony Robbins: Three to Thrive: Gratitude, Movement, and Incantations

Identify the three things you are really grateful for, feel it in your body, and connect to that feeling. Move for 30 to 45 minutes. As you move, talk about the outcomes you want to have happen in your day.

Brendan Bruchard: Productivity Planner:  List the top five action steps to take in each of the following areas: Projects, People and Priorities, and then take action on them.

Hal Elrod: Miracle Morning: Hal researched the best practices of highly successful people and created a formula that not only jump starts your day, but helps you to become happy and successful. (Gratitude, wisdom, movement, reading inspirational works, journaling, affirmations et al)

Todd Hermann: Avoid Context Switching. Focus on one thing that needs to get done in a certain time frame (in this case a day) and get it done.

I hope you enjoy using this checklist, and continue to enjoy the free content that I share on this blog. I do it, because I want to make life easier for everyone. We are so hard on ourselves, at times, and my mission is to help the people who really want to live better lives full of excitement and fulfillment do that faster, easier and in a better way.

Head on over to my website at http://www.challengeyourvision.com for more information about coaching, private martial arts instruction, and my three quick start guides that take you from where you are now to where you want to be.

Thanks for reading, and until next time,

 

 

 

Remember, you are so much more than who you believe yourself to be.

**If you want more information about Women in Aviation, and what they do,  you can click here.

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Baby, You’re Worth It

photo9Can you hear Fifth Harmony singing that line? There is something deep and true in the way they sing it. We are alive at this point in time! This is the most amazing time in history, and, yes, we are created from star material, but, sometimes, we just don’t feel like it.

Do you know what I mean? You know you’re here for a reason, but somehow, life gets in the way and you get caught up in the drama of it all. You lose focus, and you get off track. That’s true, right? You lose focus, you get off track, and wonder what happened? What’s also true is that you do get back into the groove, you do get back on track, and you do start moving forward again.

Wouldn’t it be great if you could just short circuit the process, and get back to it faster?

Imagine. Yes, let’s pretend that you’ve chartered a private jet to a place that you’ve always dreamed about. You get settled into  your sleek, beige leather seat, and look out the window with all the anticipation of someone who has arrived.

You know you’ve worked hard. You’ve earned this. No, you deserve this. A smile that satisfies passes your lips, as you sip the champagne that has just been served to you by your very own steward. “Yes, I will have another. Thank you.” You sigh that sigh, and continue your reverie of admiration, satisfaction, and contentment. It does feel, oh, so good to be you in this moment.

You’ve made it to the top. You’ve accomplished every goal, and have overcome every obstacle. There is nothing left for you to do, but to bask in your glory, the glory that is you.

Then the alarm goes off, and you reach for the snooze button. Just five more minutes can get you back to that place where you were just about to take off to enjoy your dream destination all caused by you.

The alarm goes off again. Now it’s time to get back to reality. The routine and pace of a life that you agreed to live. Not very many of us live in a world, in which, we have a private jet at our beck and call. Nor do many of us live in a world that every obstacle has been eliminated. In fact, I don’t know of anyone who lives in a world without problems, challenges or obstacles. Do you?

We all have problems. We just tend to believe that if you have a jet at your disposal, we want your kind of problem. We believe that if we had a bunch of money, the problems would be easier to manage. Would they really be easier? And if we want to check out of our lives, and ditch it all to become expats surfing in Bali every day, well, we could. The problem with this kind of imagining isn’t how wonderful it makes us feel. The problem is pretending that the struggles of people with means, or the people down the street are preferable to our own.

It’s Bull. If I were Tony Robbins, I could drop a multiple stream of F-bombs right now to shock and shake you out of your explanation about why life is better when you have a gazillion dollars, or if you had Laura’s problems, or Luke’s struggles. Life may be easier in some respects, but human beings are ingenious at f-ing up their own happiness. You don’t know what another person’s struggles are. You don’t know what they are experiencing, nor can you imagine it. So when you look at their problems, or lack there of, you think they have it BETTER than you. They don’t. They have it DIFFERENT than you.

Different isn’t Better. Different is just that. We forget that our neighbor with the private jet who vacations four times a year has problems that we cannot even begin to understand. Just recently, a famous author with a beautiful family found out he was dying from cancer. He spent Christmas in a hospital bed. If you didn’t know about his private struggle, you would think he had it all: Money, lifestyle, amazing friends, family, a great relationship et al. You would, maybe, envy him, and think, “Geez, I would love to have his life!!”  Would you if you knew the whole story? Would you really?

One of the most hurtful things we do is make assumptions — assumptions about other people, but more importantly, assumptions about who we are, and what we are capable of achieving. So what to do? It comes down to a simple choice. Every person we talk to is smart, capable, creative and talented. (Oh yes, they are. We have just been conditioned to go through our checklist of success to see if they measure up. Who said our checklist is THE checklist of smart, capable, creative and talented? And if we are judging others in that way, how are we judging ourselves?)

Do you want to become a Snoozer or do you want to become a Doer?

Have you ever noticed how much free time Snoozers have? They can spend hours watching their favorite shows over and over again, or talk incessantly about how this or that doesn’t work. These Snoozers like to talk, they like to watch, and they even like to criticize others, at times, but Snoozers rarely take action on making their lives filled with excitement and pride. They live life in the margins, because that is where they feel comfortable.

Snoozers vs. Doers. Do you think someone who earned enough money to own a private jet is a Snoozer in disguise? Do you think he or she can reenact every scene from The Flash down to the timing? Nooo. The Snoozers can kick his ass when it comes to pop trivia, but the Doers can kick the Snoozers’ collective asses when it comes to living a life of fulfillment and contribution.

The difference is focus. I can tell you right now that people who live a life that excites them, and that makes them proud don’t hit the snooze button. When the sky is awake, they are awake because they HAVE to play. Feel the power of that? Even when the sky is asleep, they still want to play, because life is just that good. They got Fifth Harmony on replay, as they are making it possible for their dreams to happen TODAY.

Don’t misunderstand. Doers can get tired. Doers can fail, and sometimes, fail badly in public. They can fail a lot, but here’s the difference — failure doesn’t faze them, anymore. They have learned that failure spurs them on to find a different way — a way that works.

So who do you want to be when you grow up? A Doer who falls flat on his or her face, but keeps getting up to live a life that is meaningful, and that is full of fulfillment and contribution? Or a Snoozer who wants that extra 5 minutes of day dreaming, because reality doesn’t measure up? The choice is yours.

Whew! I was fired up this morning, and my hope is that I got some of you inspired to take some action, because it is in  action that you find the happiness you seek.

If you have any questions, comments, or need some help with taking action on your ideas, you can head over to my website at www.challengeyourvision.com for more information.

Until next time,

Christine

 

 

 

 

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Remember, you are so much more than who you believe yourself to be.

 

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May The Rules Be Forever In Your Favor

calvinOh, how little does mom know that “Calvin Ball” is really the game called, “Calvin Wins,” because Calvin keeps changing the rules to be in his favor. Just yesterday, this thing about rules came up.

I was having coffee and a yummy (yes, chocolate) croissant with my Bestie when the conversation veered, smack dab, into a brick wall.  It went down like this:

Bestie: … I need to know that I can make money to support myself before I can do that.

Me: So, security is really important to you.

Bestie: Yes! I need to have that. I would love to try, but I  can’t support myself doing that.

Me: Ok.

Bestie: That’s it?

Me: Yep.

Bestie: Well, you think I can make money at that?

Me: Yep.

Bestie: Well how when…

Then my sweet, beautiful, Bestie, went on to list 15 million reasons why her rule was true! Okay not fifteen million, but enough conditions to make it clear that trying a new business idea would not happen for a very, very, very long time. Me? I had a different point of view. I believe we all have the capability to achieve extraordinary things.

***Note: If you are interested in making 2017 a year to remember,

download my free report by clicking here.

Have you ever noticed that people believe what they want to believe irrespective of evidence to the contrary? But what is true for my Bestie is that her conditions and beliefs are true and real for her, precisely because, she set them up that way.

What if you could set up your life so that you could win no matter what? Would you be down for learning something like that?

(By the way, Calvin is one of my favorite comic strip characters. The wisdom of Calvin just cannot be denied! You can find more “Calvin and Hobbes” comic strips here)

I noticed that I get really excited when I am sharing my rule about something that I think works, but I just don’t have the same enthusiasm when I’m talking about a rule that, well, I think is dumb, dangerous, or just won’t work. The rules I hate the most are the rules that are just rules for rules sake. Do you know what I mean?

Rules, rules and more rules. The more I looked at this rule thing, the more I saw rules everywhere: There are the rules of the game, the rules of the road, the rules of society, etiquette, friendships, relationships, the classroom, the rules at work, and so on.  I even had a rule about the toilet paper roll. If you’re curious about the rule, I believe it should be under, because it is easier to pull off what you need, and my husband insists that it should be over because it is more efficient. Efficient? Really? See how out of hand this rule thing can be?

What’s with all of these conditions, anyway? Hey! Have you noticed that everyone has rules? Even for, well, happiness. For example, I will be happy when I have five million dollars in the bank, when I have lost 15 pounds, when my children are happy, when my husband loves his job,  when I don’t have a house payment, and when I can achieve a vertical side kick at age 53. If all of those conditions are met, then I will be happy. And you know what? It sounds like I am going to be pretty miserable — for a long time.

What if my script was, “I will be happy when I open my eyes in the morning?” This rule is so much easier to meet, and happiness is so much more likely to happen every, single day!

Perhaps, it’s time to take a lesson from Calvin, and create our own versions of Calvin Ball?!

Change the Friggin Rules. When we simply change the conditions for our rules, and practice them, eventually the new rules take the place of the old rules, and thus, a new habit is formed.But more importantly, happiness happens faster and stays longer!

So, I am wondering what are your rules and are they working for you? If some of your rules are messing with your happiness, this worksheet My Rules, My Way  will help you change the rules to be in your favor. Remember that the people, things, and experiences you want in your life are proxies for how you want to feel. Keep that in mind when you work through the sheet. How do you want to feel about yourself, your life, and who you hang out with?


Gretchen Rubin talks about how we interact with inner and outer rules in relation to successfully adopting habits in her  Ted Talk below, “The 4 Ways to Successfully Adopt New Habits.”  I found it helped me not only identify how I interact with rules, it also helped me set up the game to win. By the way, when your goals conflict with your rules, you have some trouble making your goals happen. (I think I just gave you a rule:))

The truth is, you are an adult, now, and now you have the power to set up the rules, your way. So go for it! You have the right, and the responsibility to make your happiness happen.

If you have any questions, or have some rules that you want to talk about, you can reach me at info@challengeyourvision.com. If you need some help with mindset or skill set development,  you can go to my website for more information at challengeyourvision.com

Thanks for reading and until next time,

May the rules be forever in your favor!

Christinephoto(22)

You are so much more than who you believe yourself to be!

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Make. It. Real.

img_3937Pssst. I have a secret.

Yes, it is a secret that will rock your world.

Are you ready?

It’s about vision boards.

Yep, that again.

Some of you may be thinking:  “Oh, no, not again!”

Maybe I heard some groaning, and some heavy sighing, too. Maybe some of you are planning to  jump ship.

But I say, “DON’T GO!”

Hear me out. I am not going to convince you why a vision board is the best tool, ever. Even though it is.

I am not going to try to show the benefits of why this little piece of genius can change your life permanently. Even though it could.

I am not even going to tell you about the movie, and the many lives that have been changed by using this one simple tool. But that is true, too. Google it.

***Note: If you are interested in making 2017 the best year ever,

download my free report by clicking here.

There’s Science. What I am going to share, in today’s blog post, is the science behind why it works. I am going to challenge you to create an experiment where you test my claims, and see if they are true for you. Yes,  I want you to become a scientist, and instead of judging without all of the evidence, I want you to go discover whether my claim is true for you. Isn’t that the best way to find out if something is true?

Some people rely on others for information to make a decision. They rely on the media, friends, family and advertisers. It’s a short cut that works out really well if your sources are the right ones. It doesn’t work out so well if your sources mislead, misinform or just blatantly lie to you and to others.

Discover the truth. I say, Find out for yourself.” If you do the work, then you can trust the results.  I am assuming that you would care enough about the quality of your own life to put in the effort it takes to find the truth? Right?!!

If you have been a reader of this blog for a while, you know that I test things out on myself before I write about them. Sometimes, my tests don’t turn out well. But, it is in the testing that we find the truth that works for us. In this case, after four years of using them, I can tell you that vision boards work for me, and they can work for you, too. So, please keep an open mind.

Make. It. Real.  How do you make something that you want to have happen in your life a reality? You may make a goal, create the list of action steps, modify your plan when obstacles arise, and keep working it till success. That is what I do to make my goals a reality. But how come some of us can’t make our goals happen? How come some of us get off track, and either quit or put off a goal that is really important to us? Maybe the answer isn’t found in time constraints, or other people, or not having enough money, or whatever other obstacle is put in our path. Maybe in order to make it real, we have to get really, really clear on what the IT is.

That is where vision boards come in.

Test One:

  1. Imagine an experience you had recently that was important to you. Yes, you can do this. Imagine it. In all its beautiful detail. The colors, the objects, the people, the sounds, everything that happened. If you are an auditory learner, you may hear a narrative playing in your mind, or if you are a visual learner, you may see it unfold like a movie, or if you are a kinesthetic learner, you may feel it in your body more than you see it or hear it. However, it doesn’t matter which type of modality you prefer,  your imagination will replay the experience.
  2. Play with the images in your mind as you imagine the experience again. Make them far away from you, or bring them closer to you. Make them gigantic, or make them super small. Keep everything else the same. What happens to the experience when you only change the images? Does your memory change?
  3. Become a sound engineer, and play with the words, the tones, the speed and the loudness of the dialogue of this experience when you imagine it again. What happens when the talking gets really loud, and what happens when it gets really soft? When you play with the sound like that, what happens to your experience? Does your memory change?
  4. Move differently when you revisit this experience for the last time.  Change how you stand or move to sit, or have the conversation lying down. Modify any position in your body while keeping the other elements of the memory the same. What happens to the experience when you do that?

In this test, you learned that by playing with the elements of a memory, you can change your experience of that memory. You control your experience. Now how can you use this ability to help you make a future you want to have real?

Well, the images, quotes and even sounds (if digital) you use for your vision board can be arranged in a way that takes advantage of our inherent bias toward proximity and size. The closer and bigger the image, or even the louder the sound, for example, the more intense our reaction is to that stimulus. The more intense the reaction, the more we pay attention to it.

Test Two:

  1. Pay Attention to all the green objects in your room, right now. Do it. All the green objects, and when the 30 seconds are up go to the next step.
  2. Count how many blue objects you saw.
  3. What? You didn’t see any blue objects, because I said pay attention to the green ones? No, it wasn’t a trick. It was to illustrate a point.
  4. Bias, we have a lot of biases. In this case, we have a system in our brain called the reticular activating system that gets us to pay attention to the things that are important to us. In this example, I told you what was important, and you looked for it, and when you looked for it, you found what you were told to look for.

In this simple test, you learned that a directive such as “look for all the green objects” creates focus AND blindness.

Well, a vision board is similar to that directive. The vision board is telling you to pay attention to what is important to you, to the people who are important to you, and to the experiences that are important to you. The vision board primes you to look for the opportunities that match what is on your board. If you use it, correctly, over time, you can bring everything on that board into your life.

Test Three: Because, well, we like things to come in threes.

  1. Look for any experiences you have had in your past that you still can remember today. Is there a smell that you love? Or an image that makes you feel possibility? What about a book that inspired you?Or maybe a song that always makes you smile? Find that one thing.
  2. Intensity in music, in images, and in words are what make us remember that something is important to us. What is it about that one thing that spoke to you?
  3. Feel what that experience is doing for you right now. Connect with it. How could you make that feeling even stronger? Make it stronger now.
  4. Anchor it by linking the experience to the words, to the images and to the feeling that it evokes. Get as many examples of it as you can.
  5. Now. Make.It. Real. Once you are in that peak state. Get that image, word, feeling into a tangible place through a picture, a set of pictures, or through words, or a set of words and you can do it digitally or through a collage. Make the pictures big if they are really important to you. Make the images small if they are meant to be texture or the background. Place the more important pictures where you can see them first. Put the words next to the right pictures for extra intensity and power. Use the colors that speak to you that gives you that feeling. You want it to make you feel the possibility of that, well, vision.

Yes, I sort of tricked you. The last test had you create a vision board. But guess what? You did this for a memory that really moved you. What if you did this for a future that you want to be real? The steps are the same!

So there you have it. If you did all the tests, you now have a working vision board that moves you. The next step is to test it for power and pull. If it doesn’t move you, modify it till it does. Now test it. Now apply it and repeat the process.

Let me know how it goes, because the proof isn’t in what someone tells you. The proof is in the results that you attain for yourself. Thanks for hearing me out! For more information about me and what I do, visit my website at http://www.challengeyourvision.com.

Until next time,

You are so much more than who you believe yourself to be!

Christine

 

 

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Heroes Are Us

fullsizerender2” I was f-ing superman when I closed that deal! I can do no wrong!! Bring it! What’s next?!!” Can you feel that energy, power and conviction? If you are like most of us, at one time or another, you have heard or said something like it. Which got me to thinking, “What’s up with this superhero thing, and how can I use it?”

These days, superheroes are everywhere. Not only in our imaginations, but on TV shows, t-shirts, coffee mugs, bumper stickers, and at your favorite dress up shop. As you know, we flock to the movie theaters to see them do epic battles, suffer, and then come back to to be victorious. We know it’s going to end up that way, but the doubt we experience during the journey blinds us to the fact that heroes always win. It just might be not in the way we think. Do you know what I mean?

So, this superhero thing has kinda been haunting me. While I was at a conference about a week or so ago, I could close my eyes and imagine the big guy on stage in a cape with his x-ray vision, ready to fly off at a moment’s notice to save the world from itself!!! Oh my gosh, that thought is not very  far from the truth.  Have you ever noticed that we want to make super-heroes out of the people we admire most?

Joseph Campbell wrote a book about heroes, and why they touch us so deeply. You can check it out here.  According to Campbell, heroes are us. Just in case you didn’t get that, I will say it again. You and I have heroic tendencies, and when we see people we admire do brave and noble things, that recognition is ignited. In short, Campbell believes that the hero’s journey is a path of self discovery that ultimately actualizes us to be the best version of ourselves, and leads us to share our journey with others.

Guess what I used to do for fun? I would go across the street in front of my house, jump the fence, and navigate the hillside to get to the park. Then I would run through my drills: spear throwing with the reed grass, obstacle course, imaginary bow and arrow shooting, climbing hills to evade attack, and finally, lassoing suspect bushes to force them to tell me the truth. I didn’t really care if an adult would watch me with amusement. If another kid came to the park, they would, inevitably,  want to jump in and help me defeat the bad guys. Wonder Woman was my girl. Linda Carter, all by herself, ignited the imagination of girls everywhere. Never before did we have a TV series that portrayed a woman as the star of the show. A star, by the way,  that was beautiful, strong, smart and kind.fullsizerender

Yes, this is me as my favorite super hero a couple of Halloween’s ago. Notice the lasso of truth. You, probably, can’t see it from the photo, but my invisible plane is parked in our driveway ready for my next adventure. Isn’t it funny that I really became a commercial pilot, and certified flight instructor, or that one of my basic values is to search for the truth in real life? I think it is no accident, because I think the superhero we admire most embodies the qualities that we most like to experience in ourselves.

So I am wondering, who is your favorite superhero and why? Perhaps by asking that question, you will discover something amazing about yourself. What would life be like for you if you embodied the characteristics you love most about your hero, and lived those values every day? I encourage you to go out, and become your own superhero. It is not only fun, it may just bring you back to the excitement of discovery, and the feeling of being the best version of you that is possible. By the way, just so you know, superheroes live among us. They leave clues, so look for them. That lady next door may have the skill set you need to learn, or the man at the grocery store who is bagging your groceries may have the solution to a problem. When people don’t openly wear their capes they hard to identify. You never know, unless you start asking some questions.

If you have any questions, or have some superhero ideas you want to share, you can reach me at info@challengeyourvision.com. If you need some help with mindset or skill set development,  you can go to my website for more information at challengeyourvision.com

Thanks for reading, and until next time,

You are so much more than who you believe yourself to be!

Christine

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I Gotta Feeling

lightningI just got back from a conference in West Palm Beach, FL. What a total mind fu–! Not the bad kind, but the good kind!! The kind that transforms your mindset, while expanding your capacity to give with all of your heart. From that event, I got a feeling that I needed to share with you some of the key insights that I have learned when I was put into that kind of immersive environment for 5 days.

One of the most beautiful things about being human is our capacity for story telling. The way we can weave a tapestry of phrases into something that moves and touches us deeply is truly extraordinary. The stories that were shared at this conference made us laugh and cry. They inspired us to be more than who we believe ourselves to be. But there is also a danger in storytelling, and that danger happens when we use our stories in a way that causes us to get caught up in the emotion of the experience, and in doing so, we miss the truth that is right in front of our faces. Enjoy my key insights, and if I can be of help to you, check me out at my website http://www.challengeyourvision.com

Key Insight 1: Business is a spiritual game. It is the greatest expression of your values. Treat it with the same respect.

Key Insight 2: We make things too complicated. Break it down into manageable pieces.

Key Insight 3:  Separate your explanation of events from the facts of the events. By doing that you become very clear about cause and effect.

Key Insight 4: Ask better questions. The better the question, the better your results. For example, “What am I missing?” vs. “I know it is this and this and this, what are we going to do about it?”

Key Insight 5: You need a birds-eye view of your life and your business, as well as a daily action plan. If you have one but not the other you can easily get lost.

Key Insight 6: Save your freak out for the abnormal problems. The normal ones, are, well, normal. You will also have a happier existence when daily problems are viewed through this lens.

Key Insight 7: Fear and Faith are both imagined.Which team do you want to play on? If you use fear as a trigger for your faith, your potential for success goes up immeasurably.

Key Insight 8: Mutual Fund Managers are robbing our children of their inheritance. We need to fix this bull shit.

Key Insight 9: Meditation is the key to focus. Focus is the key to success. Success happens when we focus on the right things. We focus on the right things when we ask the right questions. The right question is usually, “What am I or what are we missing?”

Key Insight 10: If you don’t schedule time for play, you are missing out on the joy of life. What little thing can you add to your day that will bring you more fun? The quality of your daily life can be vastly improved by this one act.

These insights are only a few of the many I learned over these past five days. The people I met at this event were amazing souls with big hearts who want to make a difference in the world. One of them gave me this piece of advice. She said, “Five is death.” I didn’t really understand what she meant, and she went on to explain. “On a scale from one to 10, if you are at a five, if you are comfortable, you are dead.” Then it hit me.

Drive doesn’t exist in comfort. You have to pull yourself away from that and choose the discomfort. The discomfort that will make you grow. I needed to hear that message, because there are times when I LOVE my comfyness. I got my hot cocoa, and my fuzzy jamies, and the tv shows that I love to escape in, and the great food I want to savor. But relaxation and enjoyment isn’t the main goal of life! It is in the pursuit and the attainment of our dreams that we feel excited and proud.

I am in the business of life coaching and martial arts. What I really do is teach you the skill set and the mindset to create a life that excites you and that makes you proud to call your own. Relaxation and comfort come after the good fight. It comes after the battle has been fought for the day. It is not a goal in and of itself. It is the reward for living a life on your own terms. Comfortable is death to a soul that is meant to be alive.

Here is a link for more information about the man and the message who put on this event. He changes lives daily, and has made the world a better place, by simply choosing that his life is going to be the one HE created. You can do the same.

Until next time,Christine

photo(22)info@challengeyourvision.com

 

How Do You Know?

DSC02109You know that Justin Bieber song, “What do you mean? When you nod your head yes, but you wanna to say no? What do you mean?…” In the song, the Beebs is asking for clarity. So it is kinda funny — to me anyway — that the background music of that song is playing in my mind when I ask, “How do you know?” as in “How do you know which goal to go after?”

It was about last night. I was having an interesting conversation with a girlfriend of mine framed by some tasty beverages and yummy food. She is a smart, savvy girl who works really hard. She works at her job, she works making her household hum, and she works on making sure her children have the best childhood experience possible. She sounds like a lot of moms that I have the privilege to know. Our conversation drifted and meandered, as they sometimes do, and landed on the subject of goals. Why? It’s a new year and goals are on our brains like an egg sizzling in a pan. We may turn off the direct heat, but the egg continues to cook. Same thing. New year’s day has passed, but we are still cooking. How about you? Are you still thinking about how to make this year THE year?

As I headed home from the restaurant, it was goals, goals, and more goals. I was stuck on goals: How to choose them, how to support them, and how to redirect them if necessary. The topic has many layers of meaning, because as I thought about our chat, I recognized that goals are proxies for something much more important than attaining the goal itself. Our goals are tied to our identity, and who we see ourselves as when we achieve that goal.

If I am an Olympic Champion that means I am ______________________.

If I made over a million dollars in sales that means I am ____________________.

If I climbed Mt. Everest that means I am ___________________________.

You can fill in the blank for any goal that means something to you. The truth is in the excitement and pride you feel on the other end of the goal. It is in the successful creation and attainment of your goals that your identity is revealed to you and to others.

Truth“Our goals are tied to our identity,and who we see ourselves as when we achieve that goal.”

Take a look at the infographic to the right. How willing are you to do what is necessary to achieve success? The answer is another question. How badly is your identity tied to that outcome? So I am wondering, what outcome do you want this year? And how do you know which goals to choose to make that outcome happen?

Here are my five steps for goal selection:

  1. What is most important to you? Remember Maslow’s Heirarchy of Needs? If you don’t, click on the link for a quick instalook. I wouldn’t get too caught up on the idea that you have to satisfy one need before you can pay attention to the other. Instead, I would look at the pyramid as a guide to what is most important to you for this year. Is it world domination? Is it love from a significant other? Is it to be healthier, so that you have energy for the people and adventures that matter most to you?
  2. Pick a few preliminary goals. Now that you have an area. You need to pick a few goals that you can really identify with. That means that if you achieved these goals, you would be excited about who you are and proud of what you have accomplished.
  3. Identify if there are any conflicts with your goals by doing my version of the wheel of life. It’s free and you can click wheelhouse to get it. This exercise rates your satisfaction in four key areas. Then you evaluate whether your preliminary goals conflict with the other areas in your life that are important to you. If this exercises revealed a goal that is important to you, add it to the list.
  4. Narrow Your Choices Down by choosing a target date of 90 days into the future. If you can’t realistically achieve the goal in 90 days remove it from the list. If you find that a goal is really important to you, and you don’t want to remove it  break it down into achievable 90 day mini-goals.
  5. Make your final decision based on impact. Which of the goals left will give you the greatest level of satisfaction, and by achieving it, will make life a whole lot better for you? Choose that goal.

I hope my Five Steps for Goal Selection made the process of choice a little easier, gave you a bit more awareness about the process, and helped you to pick the right goal for you at this time in your life. If you have any questions, or need help, you can contact me at info@challengeyourvision.com, or head on over to challengeyourvision.com.

Remember you are so much more than who you believe yourself to be.

Until next time,

Christinephoto(22)

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A New Year, A New Life … Maybe

dreamstime_m_31165919It’s 2017 and my inbox is slammed with ways to help me make the most of this year. I have offers from almost every self development expert out there. Why? I love the industry, and as a coach, I want to learn the best tools available for myself and for my clients. Frankly, I know they are great people trying to do good works, and at this time of year, there is a huge opportunity to capitalize on the momentum and hope we feel that a new year will bring. I think, however, with all of their good intentions flowing into my inbox like the Colorado rapids, I get overwhelmed by choice. So I default to simple. First, can I create some space in my schedule to think, to reflect, and to breathe? I don’t know what to choose, but I want to choose something to do, to learn and to experience this year. But first, I just need some time to think. I had an amazing 2016 despite some personal heartache, but for some of us, it wasn’t so amazing at all. Maybe there was a death in the family, a loss of a friendship, unnecessary bickering, or a health challenge that has consumed our attention? Doesn’t it make sense that before we dive in, jump in with both feet, or take the plunge — what is it with these metaphors?? — we take a moment, and just be?

For me, I haven’t made any firm commitments with regard to goals, right now. Instead, I am slowly getting acclimated to the water. Testing the temperature, seeing what feels right, and laying the groundwork for what I have decided will be an amazing year for me and my family. I suppose you can call that “a resolution.” A resolution is a firm commitment, a decision to do or not to do something. So when we are talking about “resolutions” we are really talking about the commitment it takes to achieve the goals we want in our lives. No wonder only 45% of us will even declare a resolution according to the University of Scranton Study on Resolutions, December 2016. In that same study, they found that by the end of the year, only 8% out of the original 45% were successful at achieving their goals. If the past is a good predictor of the future, that doesn’t bode well for New Year’s Resolutions.

Maybe the reason why that number is so low is because we focus on the wrong thing. We decide to go after a goal, because it sounds good, or it would be nice if we did that, or got this. But we are not “resolute” in our attainment of the goal. Maybe a better way would be to give some thought to how we want to feel about our lives, how we want to feel about ourselves,  and how we want to feel about who we hang out with each day, before we choose a goal to be resolute about. Maybe then the 92% who make resolutions will become part of the 8% who make them a reality.

So if you are like me and want to take a moment to reflect, I have a free gift for you. I created a fun year in review that takes 15 minutes to do, and that you can do with your family. It will have you revisit the highlights of 2016, and will also get you thinking about what you may want to have happen in 2017. Click here for the download year-in-review1.

Have a great week! Time is on your side, and so am I!!

Until next time,

Christinephoto(22)